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Got these 2 books at my local Raddiwala (Bhangaarwala aka Kabaadiwala) for wonly 30 bucks..
One does really get some really hidden gems and magic lamps at the old paper marts :)
Event Details:
Date: 29 March 2008
Time: 9:00am to 6:00pm
Venue: IIT Mumbai
Shailesh J Mehta School of Management (SJMSOM) at IIT Bombay
Powai, Mumbai – 400076
Register here : http://barcampmumbai.org/BCM3_registrants
Sorry for the language but this is how the exact memo was.....
Microsoft's Memo to its Indian Staff
This is a REAL MEMO from Microsoft HR Director in Redmond, WA to its
staff of Indian Origin. Every word here is kept intact without
alteration.
MEMO TO INDIAN STAFF
In view of the large number of Indians working in the USA, UK and many
other countries with White People, it has become important for Human
Resources Department to issue directives to their Indian staff.
TO ALL HINDI-SPEAKING STAFF
It has been brought to our attention by several officials visiting our
corporate headquarters that offensive language is commonly used by our
Hindi-speaking staff. Such behavior, in addition to violating our
policy, is highly unprofessional and offensive to both visitors and
colleagues.
Staff will IMMEDIATELY adhere to the following rules:
1. Words like CHUTIYA, GANDU and other such expressions will not be used
for emphasis, no matter how heated the discussion. You will not say
CHUTIYE, AKKAL NAHI HAI KYA TEREKO when someone makes a mistake, or
MADAR CHOD, BHENCHOD when a major mistake has been made. All forms
derived from the verb CHOD are inappropriate in our environment.
2. No project manager, section head or administrator, under any
circumstances, will be referred to as GADHA or CHUTIYA. Lack of
determination will not be referred to as KAAMCHOR SAALA and neither will
persons who lack initiative be referred to as BHOSADIKAA or MADARCHOD.
3. Unusual or creative ideas from your superiors are not to be referred
to as GAND FAADU, if a person is persistent, or if a task is heavy to
accomplish. In a similar way, do not use GAND FATI, if a colleague is
going through a difficult situation.
4. Furthermore, you must not say BHOSADE MEIN GAYA when matters become
complicated. When asking someone to leave you alone, you must not say
DIMAG KI MAA BHEN MAT KAR. Do not ever substitute 'May I help you?' with
BOL TERI GAND KAISE MARU?
5. When things get tough, an acceptable _expression such as 'We are
going through a difficult time' should be used, rather than MAA CHUDI
PADI HAI or GOTI MUH MEIN HAI..
6. No salary increase shall be ever referred to as KHAIRAAT BAATI JAA
RAHI HAI KYA. Under no circumstances should you call our elderly
corporate partners as BUDDHA KHOOSAT.
7. Last, but not least, after reading this memo, please do not say: YE
KAGAJ GAND PONCHNE KE LAAYAK BHI NAHI HAI.We hope you will keep these
directions in mind.
Sincerely,
Steve Rider
Human Resources, Director Microsoft Corporation
Got this deadly fwd from Sandy.
Over the weekend, I filled up my car's fuel tank, and I thought fuel
has become really expensive after the recent price hike. But then I
compared it with other common liquids and did some quick calculations,
and I felt a little better.
To know why, see the results below - you'll be surprised at how
outrageous some other prices
are !
Diesel (regular): Rs.! 36.08 pe r litre
Petrol (speed): Rs.52 per litre
Coca Cola 330 ml can : Rs.20 = Rs.61 per litre
Dettol antiseptic 100 ml Rs.20 = Rs.200 per litre
Radiator coolant 500 ml Rs.160 = Rs.320 per litre
Pantene conditioner 400 ml Rs.165 = Rs.413 per litre
Medicinal mouthwash like Listerine 100 ml Rs.45 = Rs. 450 per litre
Red Bull 150 ml can : Rs.75 = Rs.500 per litre
Corex cough syrup 100 ml Rs.57 = Rs. 570 per litre
Evian water 500 ml Rs. 330 = Rs. 660 per litre Rs. 660 for a litre of
WATER???!!! And the buyers don't even know the source (Evian spelled
backwards is naive.)
Kores whiteout 15 ml Rs. 15 = Rs. 1000 per litre
Cup of coffee at any decent business hotel 150 ml Rs. 175 = Rs. 1167 per litre
Old Spice after shave lotion 100 ml Rs. 175 = Rs. 1750 per litre
Pure almond oil 25 ml Rs. 68 = Rs. 2720 per litre
And this is the REAL KICKER... HP deskjet colour ink cartridge 21 ml
Rs.1900 = Rs. 90476 per litre!!!
Now you know why computer printers are so cheap ? So they have you
hooked for the ink !
So, the next time you're at the pump, don't curse our honorable
Petroleum minister - just be glad your car doesn't run on cough syrup,
after shave, coffee, or God forbid, printer ink !
For the last 10 days there have been infinites articles and placed articles Mumbai Mirror, Hindustan Times, DNA, Mid-Day etc on Car Pool, how much fun Carpooling is, Car Poolers are a happy lot etc etc .
Some paid stories : )
http://www.mid-day.com/web/guest/lifeatwork/lifeatwork/article?_EXT_5_articleId=1059487&_EXT_5_groupId=14
http://www.mid-day.com/web/guest/opinion/columns/article?_EXT_5_articleId=1032065&_EXT_5_groupId=14
Well, am not against Mykoolpool.com or carpool.com or the Promotion of these services but what bugs me is that these guys forgot one of the cheapest ideas of pooling… i.e Share-e-Rickshaw…. Not to be confused with Share-e-Punjab.
Rickshaws beat Cars hands down when it comes to VFM and convenience.
• Rickshaws run on CNG which is cheaper and cleaner than Petrol which most cards guzzle.
• Rickshaw have the latest jhankaar music, no car even with the best Kenwood or Bose speakers can beat.
• Rickshaws can go thru Shankar Gully but cars cant.
• You can park Rickshaw anywhere, You might go mad finding a parking place for your car.
• Rickshaws don’t get towed away.
• Cars have A/c… Rickshaws are Aircool.
• You can update yourself on the MNS v/s Bihari/UP war in the Rickshaw and ask questions like Rajdeep Sardesai.
• You are saving India’s FoRex Reserves.
On the flip side :
• Hijras can feel you at every signals
• BEST Buses & Trucks fart emissions in your face
• Every other Rickshaw passengers tries to ogle or try to catch a glimpse of every rickshaw passenger hoping it’s a maal female…
• Bad roads can hurt your balls and abs near Sakinaka, Chincoli Bandar, Powai
Having said that there still remains the cheapest way to travel in Bombay , Take the Railway pass or BEST Bus which promises unlimited travel for less than 500 per month. : )
Btw I travel by Bus, Shared- Rick, Local Train and occasional Car : )
Got this via SMS : )
1.Women wear high heels to bed
2.Men r never impotent
3.Women always orgasm when men do
4.All women r noisy fucks
5.Man always groan OH YEAH when they cum
6.A common & enjoyable sexual practice 4 a man is to take his half erect penis & slap it repeatedly on a woman's butt
7.Asian men don’t exist
8.Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man's trousers & finds a cock there
Borivili ATM swallows plastic, belches paper
http://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?NewsID=1157384
Am not surprised this is in my area of Borivli, some morons must have fed it Bubble gum or nakli notes : )
Western Digital 160GB USB Portable Hard Drive
Got this sexy Hard Drive at Anupam Bookstore for Rs 4200 wonly, Croma is charging 5200 for this same shit, total Loot!!
The moral of the story is dont just go by what the Advertisers feed you there are stuff cheaper than Next, Croma, Big Bazaar...
You may wanna check out http://www.compareindia.com/ , India's answer to Froogle.
The madness of the Dot Com Mania is back, there are some crazy free Offers and SMS Sites, Websites offering or at least promising to offer Money or share in profits on the Web and Mobile all riding the bandwagon of SMS adverting.
Mginger : mGinger pays you for reading SMS on your mobile phones, ( i.e. @ 0.20 paisa per SMS received, 10 Paisa per SMS your referred friend reads, 5 paisa for SMS read by friends referrals
Sounds like Mobile Amway minus Investments
mGinger is funded by Draper Fisher Juvertson( DFJ), NEA Indo-US Ventures
Paymate – Giftmate
First of its kind mobile voucher which can redeemed on most of the ecommerce sites in India, once you sign up you get free gift voucher regularly ( Rs 100, Rs 250).
They are backed by Sherpalo & Kleiner Perkins Caulfield & Byer.
Youmint
Free SMS upto 80 Characters & refer your friends and get money.
Same on the lines on Mginger, not too many details given on the investors.
And yes they promise to save INR 900 a month on your mobile bills !
Others Companies on Similar lines or Madness Levels..
Rupee Mail
http://bombaylives.blogspot.com/2007/10/rupeemail-money-for-reading-mails.html
Vakow
http://bombaylives.blogspot.com/2008/01/vakow-4-doz-who-luv-sms-fwdz.html
SMS Gupshup
If you know any other services like these, Do scribble in..
Cheers & Get Rich Soon
p.s The idea here is not to make fun of any ventures or services, rather make a list of options that a mobile user has if he wants to make moolah
· MTV roadies 5.0 is all about hot mean bitches rather than Bikes and attitude, the only chic (Parbjot) who could ride a bike is voted out while the padded ones are still batting.
· Will the Commies support China on Tibet ala 1962
· What happens to the honest farmer who repaid his loan, does he get anything for being a nice guy?
· Kashmir Singh’s disclosure to the media has screwed the chances of all Indian languishing in Pakistani jails
· Gold at 13K , Indian weddings would now need Z plus security.
· The current problem in Goa is due the fixation for Gori Chamdi, Goa still is the best & safest place in India.
· Am trying to figure out Mginger, it says I’ll get paid for receiving SMS ads.
· BMC’s fine for littering is 200 bucks, Shitting on the road = Zero fine
· I wish the government- media took pains to understand SSC – HSC student, it’s sad to read many trying to end their life over these exams. All da best to ya all.
· I put glow signs, My room is now like Nehru Planetarium
I start writing something, then I get bored and I delete.. then I pause, ponder then scribble again…
Things seem so damn boring these days, Has it something to do with the markets & rolling.
I wish I had the answers, until then am closing my eyes and meditating and also trying to walk on the path of Siddha Yoga.
Nice presentation on Mobile VAS in India by Stanford University & BDA.
It's titled 'Mobile Vas In India' and you can view it here.
Oscar winner Michael Clayton is George Clooney at his very best, This legal thriller is something like Erin Brockovich...Totally Smooth and Slick...
Am not sharing any spoilers, If you want pls check wikipedia :))
I would give 4/5.
Loved what Micheal Says "I'm Shiva.. God of Death"
[follow me on twitter]
Twitter is the simplest and best way to follow daily happenings & world around me.
And do check it out yourself, they have also started the Indian short-code (5566511), One can also access via wap (m.twitter.com) and IM (twitter@twitter.com).. So its damn sexy!!
Birdie Pic via Gaping Void :)
http://www.mid-day.com/web/guest/news/mumbai/article?_EXT_5_articleId=1023370&_EXT_5_groupId=14
Maazgaon resident, Akbarali Badakhshani is a real hero, I hope the shady taxi driver's & Rickshawallah's are punished for their act... Dadar, Kurla, VT , Airport everywhere foreigners and out station visitor is conned, cheated and robbed..
Acts like these give fodder & petrol for parties like MNS and Shiv Sena .
http://specials.rediff.com/sports/2008/mar/03sld1.htm
No its not them.. Its Serena and Venus, the best aces in women's Tennis :)
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